How to Bounce Back after Troubling Times

One question that has come up multiple times recently in our community is, “Lisa, how do I bounce back after troubling times?” Or, as I like to say, “How do I bounce back even when there’s a PIVOT or DISRUPTION in life?”

This is a very relevant topic and much needed right now as our world is experiencing so much change and disruption.

That’s why I wanted to share two powerful, juicy nuggets to help you bounce back and enhance your resiliency. I have personally used these techniques to get me through some of the most troubling times I have faced.

#1 Quit giving power to what knocks you down in the first place. 

You may have heard me say once or twice or maybe more like one million times that energy grows where energy goes. So, when you have a conversation repeatedly about something difficult that has happened, or when you share the situation over and over with different people or post about it on social media, you’re actually giving energy to the situation or circumstance that knocked you down in the first place.

“Let me tell you what happened to me. Let me tell you what I’ve been through. Let me tell you what’s going on in my life.” Sound familiar? Every time you do that and focus on the situation, you’re actually giving the situation MORE power. Now, let me be clear I’m not discounting what’s happened to you. I’m just challenging you to start focusing on moving forward and shifting the power to what you are doing in the now.

When I’m going through something, I love to design my life on the other side of it. Sometimes that’s really hard to do when you’re inside the challenging financial time or the toxic relationship or the raw emotions. However, if you can lift your head up long enough to see over the horizon, paint a picture of what it looks like on the other side, and get sold out on your next best season, then your current situation won’t be as challenging to navigate through.

#2 Give yourself 1,000 second chances.  

We tend to extend grace to others but give very little of it to ourselves. So, I challenge you to give yourself 1,000 second chances. And every time you get to 999, I want you to press the RESET button. Have grace with yourself. Your job is not to get it perfect. Your job is just to get better on your path to being the best version of yourself.

What is important to understand is that your best five years ago is not your best today. So, don’t judge yourself based on what you know now when you look back at a decision you made in 1998 or 2010. Part of your bounce back is to stop and say, “Hold on I get another chance. I know I’ve done this at least 10 times or 20 times or 30 times. But this is life. I get another chance. Every single time, you get another chance to manage your finances. You get another chance to fall in love. You get another chance to design your perfect weight or health. You get another chance to be spiritual.

I learned to stop pursuing perfection and instead began pursuing the best version of me in this season, based on what I know right now. I often tell people I’ve never been the smartest person, but I am the most resilient. The difference between me and most others is that they stopped at chance #68, while I say, “Let’s press the reset and give it another go.” I want to invite you to do the same.

Remember, In good times or troubling times, this is your home. We are your tribe, and I will always be your sister in prosperity and possibility.

52 replies
    • Coachpaulineelizabeth
      Coachpaulineelizabeth says:

      Thank you Lisa,

      WOW WOW WOW I am not pursuing perfection, l am pursuing to be the best version of me, l am giving my self permission to live in the house that`s waiting for me, this time my bounce will be high, thank you l give my self permission to press pause when necessary

      Reply
    • Thank you, Thank you Thank you - I spent my whole life giving everyone another chance but myself thank you for reminding me that I get to have another chance too
      Thank you, Thank you Thank you - I spent my whole life giving everyone another chance but myself thank you for reminding me that I get to have another chance too says:

      Thank you, Thank you Thank you – I spent my whole life giving everyone another chance but myself thank you for reminding me that I get to have another chance too

      Reply
    • jane
      jane says:

      Wow! Quit giving power to what knocks you down #BOL I am shifting my focus to the now and rising my head over the horizon. Giving myself 1000 x 1000 chances, not scared to hit the RESET button. Best version of ME #AHA Thank you, Thank you, Thank you, sister.

      Reply
  1. Jherrikah H.
    Jherrikah H. says:

    Thank you for not giving up on Lisa. Your resilience through your journey help us all get to the other side. You don’t know the depth of how your bravery has personally helped me. Your email came right after I sat on the floor to calm myself. I am so grateful for you!

    Reply
    • Lisa Nichols
      Lisa Nichols says:

      Jherrikah, I am so glad this came at a time where you needed it the most. Keep bouncing back.
      I love you,
      Lisa

      Reply
  2. Cress
    Cress says:

    I’m so grateful for your work
    I have hit rock bottom a few times in my life
    Last time in 2016 I lost my mum 10 months before my father in law 11 months before I then lost my relationship of 20 years and my cat and all my friends I moved to different city and no job, no lace to live
    Listen to you everyday when I was there and found you so inspiring
    I went through some deep healing for 8 months
    Reconciled with husband and moved to a different area in B.C. August 2017
    Thank you

    Reply
  3. Kgomotso Dikeledi
    Kgomotso Dikeledi says:

    Thank you for your prophetic message, I can’t tell you how many times I look back and regret on things that I could have done better, of how I used to be at my best in the past,…Yes..YES sister Lisa I really needed to hear that. May God do you good.
    Lots of love
    Kgomotso Dikeledi

    Reply
  4. Kaye P. Brooks
    Kaye P. Brooks says:

    Thank you so much Lisa. It just feels good to hear my sister remind me and jolt my thoughts to keep going because I get a second thousands worth of chances. I should on myself but I get anorher chance so….I’m moving forward. Thank you for being Lisa and sharing a little bit of you with me. See you soon.

    Reply
    • Thank you Lisa . You really gave me more clarity and I look forward to more communication with you♥️
      Thank you Lisa . You really gave me more clarity and I look forward to more communication with you♥️ says:

      Thank you for emailing me with your powerful message. I look forward to communication with you. I’m writing a book. It’s my life story. I’ve been told from more people than I can count to write it. Can you reach out to me please♥️

      Reply
  5. Shonte Smith
    Shonte Smith says:

    Hello everybody,
    This video was well needed on a Sunday morning. I’m a 27 and a mother of a 7 month old son. In addition to the stress and worries that comes with motherhood especially during these times, I have been having my own troubles.
    I am struggling with not letting go of who I used to be- a beauty pageant contestant, a whole traveler, a philanthropist. I feel like now I’m just a mom. I’m discrediting how beautiful that is and how much of a privilege that is but it’s hard. With motherhood comes the lack of a social life, ambitions, and my most worrisome problem- my weight. Im not as attractive as I used to be and I’m having a hard time with that. I love how you mentioned how continuing giving a situation energy gives it more life. Just yesterday the manager of a department store asked me if I was pregnant. I wanted to cry, and of course as I am doing right now I repeated this story maybe 20 times since then. And Miss Lisa your right, I have to give myself more second chances to make myself right with myself. I still have dreams, ambitions and goals- I will not be who I was before I had my son but I will be better. I just have to give myself more chances to do so. #GracenotPerfection
    Thank you everyone for reading and many blessings to you all!

    Reply
    • Lisa Nichols
      Lisa Nichols says:

      Thank you so much for sharing your story with the community, Shonte. You have so much strength and you will find your way back to you in this stage of your life.
      I love you and believe in you.

      Reply
  6. gigi bliss
    gigi bliss says:

    Thank you Lisa! Your email today was sent at the exact timing. I am going through my disruption in my life and the number one thing you said is to stop giving energy to it. Even though the situation is still present and very uncertain and undetermined. The best thing is to look up, reset, and not let it rob you from your most powerful moment. That is right now! Thank you for reminding me and thank you for your spirit, strength, and inspiring presence.

    Reply
  7. Thuli
    Thuli says:

    Wow.. Lisa I needed to hear this.. Aha moment stop giving power to what knocked you down. I am done giving power to the past. I’ll cherish my present moment, yes..yes..oh.another AHA hit Reset button Thanks Lisa for sharing the pearls of wisdom.

    Reply
  8. Michelle
    Michelle says:

    The main point I needed to be reminded of is that I keep telling people that I don’t make a ton of money being self-employed as a ghostwriter/book collaborator. And because of that continual declaration, I keep NOT making a ton of money from what I do. This was a fabulous reminder to STOP speaking that message over my life and business and create a new, more empowering statement.

    Reply
  9. betty
    betty says:

    I am so glad you reminded me to pursue the very best version of me.I have listened to know and i just want to know where to start my own place i can communication with ppl just like you.I have been having a cold feet about going life of Facebook because i do not want everyone but i guess i can get a conversation going then have them opt to a private conversation.May God give me that grace.

    Reply
  10. Elizabeth Uchealor
    Elizabeth Uchealor says:

    I loved the part about giving yourself 1000 chances and also lifting up your head to see the horizon that you are going towards. These are difficult times for sure but I am pressing reset to learn more and grow more. Thanks, Lisa, this was inspiring.

    Reply
  11. Anita
    Anita says:

    Thank you so much for all your encouraging messages. I am living right now in troubled waters. I am almost 61years old with a wrong marriage still going on and I am financially ruined. I decided to go back to college to get a degree that will help me to rebuild my life, and I always remind myself about your story, when you promised your son “that mommy will never be broke again”! But I am not strong and young like you and my battle is a daily deal with myself! Thank you again for your messages.

    Reply
  12. Sean D PALMER
    Sean D PALMER says:

    Thank you this encouragement dialogue, I am currently going through a very traumatic experience in my life and I needed this message. I do find that I am more critical with myself than I am with others and I do have to keep my heart in the thinking process and not to loose my compassion with myself. Thank you for this wonderfully inspiring message.

    Reply
  13. Patrice Lockhart
    Patrice Lockhart says:

    Thank you for being my sister in prosperity and possibility, I think you are amazing and you have been motivating me for YEARS.
    I will share this with a friend who could really use this session.

    Much Love

    Reply
    • Cynthia R Davis
      Cynthia R Davis says:

      I loved it. Stop giving your past the power live in today give yourselves a 1000 chances I needed that. Thank you Lisa N.

      Reply
  14. Joy J.
    Joy J. says:

    Thanks so much for this confirming post. I’m in the process of writing a book on Resilience and God has been constantly confirming His Word to me for His people.

    Reply
  15. Vanetta White
    Vanetta White says:

    Thank you very much for this positive and powerful message Lisa. I love you and keep up the great work. You are truly wonderful and amazing.

    Reply
  16. Leanora E. Mims
    Leanora E. Mims says:

    Thank you for this teaching! You are so amazing. Don’t give your power to a negative situation in your past.
    This one was the AHA for me. I have been doing this and I NEED TO STOP. I am going to hit reset. LEAVE IT IN THE REVIEW MIRROR and move on to my greatness in grace.

    Reply
  17. Karyne
    Karyne says:

    Hi SisterFriend!

    This was awesome. I’ve recently noticed that I ALWAYS try to make things perfect. My mom and I have recently started a business and I didn’t really want people to come in until it was completely set up. However, that isn’t my current reality. I have to make money either way. I’ve also been juggling so many things that I was to the the point of feeling like I was failing. But now I understand that I need to lay one brick at a time and give myself 1000 second chances in the process. This was so helpful and encouraging. Thanks A MILLION !!!

    Reply
  18. Deborah Smith
    Deborah Smith says:

    Wow I really appreciate everything you have said I realized that was exactly what I was doing especially when you said giving energy the situation that was me/as well as not having any Grace for myself just thank you so much ma’am you are heaven sent!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  19. Kassandra
    Kassandra says:

    Hi Lisa,

    Thank you for allowing God to use you as a vessel. Thank you for reminding me, I got this. I needed to her this message today. Restart

    Reply
  20. Lois
    Lois says:

    Thank you for reminding me that the more I talk about an issue, the more power it takes in my life. I am dealing with a person at work who pushes her work on to other people (mainly me, but others too). We used to grumble and get upset the extra work we are doing for her and she takes a bigger salary than all of us. Instead of grumbling about it, I went to management and spoke to them about it. The problem I feel is now off my plate and I have put it into the hands of the people who will deal with the problem. Instead of that “tape” running on a loop in my head of how it makes me feel, it is out of my hands. I have also told the people grumbling that talking about it over and over again is just giving more power to the problem. Speak to the person that can handle the problem, then let it go.
    I also love your reminder of the decisions in the past were made from information we had at that time. Instead of looking back at those decisions and beating myself up that I did not make wiser decisions, I remember those decisions were made with the education and information I had at that time in my life. I keep reminding myself that I am wiser and stronger now to make better decisions now and in the future.
    I love listening to your show! You are a happy, positive force in my life’s journey. Thank you for all you do.

    Reply
  21. Toyin Okunuga
    Toyin Okunuga says:

    I love you my sister Lisa, I will sure press that reset button and give myself another 1000 chances again xx

    Reply
  22. Atreyee
    Atreyee says:

    Yes, this is my AHA moment, really! thanks for endorsing and reminding that resilience is a key trait for success. Resilience powered my life, for ever.

    Reply
  23. Bernice Brown
    Bernice Brown says:

    My AHA moment was hearing that I can lighten up on myself and reset. I am nearing my sixty mark and sometimes feel as though I have not accomplished much although others keep reminding me of what I have done I can not see it myself. I am excellent at motivating others and seeing them prosper, but have problems applying the same concept to my life.

    Reply
  24. Danielle
    Danielle says:

    Thank you Lisa. I needed to be reminded of that, I know my best today isn’t my best 5 years ago. Looking to the future with positivity and beyond the current situation is necessary and makes it easier to breathe. Thank you

    Reply

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